I think that L got distracted from getting his permit because he realized that he wasn't going to be able to really drive before leaving for college anyway (he wouldn't have had enough practice months under his belt). Anyway, he didn't jump on it and now it's too late because I made one phone call.
Just kidding, but I did speak with our insurance company yesterday and they told us that it would cost us $1620.00 EXTRA a year (on top of the $1,700 per year we already pay) to insure him to drive the family cars. That is, we weren't asking about insuring him and his OWN car... which he won't get from us anyway.
We don't have to pay anything if he gets just his permit (when we always have to accompany him in the car).
So, we've decided to let him get a permit as long as he can have it and practice until NEXT summer when he'll get his license and we'll start shelling out the bucks for the privilege of lending him our car.
Seriously though, if it saves us from the boring boring driving and waiting of this summer, we'll do it.
On the bright side, now I can look at all my driving duty this summer as though it were a paying job. Procrastination pay! Ha ha!
16 July 2014
14 July 2014
Home, James
July 9 - 14, 2014 (wrote this over several days)
Yesterday L said to me, “Do you
ever imagine what your life would be like if you didn’t have to take me to
rehearsal and wait around all those hours?”
His point was that he wanted me to take him to a mall in East Brunswick instead. From that mall he would get a ride to rehearsal from somebody in the show (a girl) and I’d just have to show up at the end of rehearsal to pick him up.
His point was that he wanted me to take him to a mall in East Brunswick instead. From that mall he would get a ride to rehearsal from somebody in the show (a girl) and I’d just have to show up at the end of rehearsal to pick him up.
I said, “okay,” but then I
remembered Hi- – to whom we give a ride every day. So, L contacted Hi and he said he
would go to the mall too.
It was getting complicated, but seemed it could work. Still I could tell that something wasn’t right.
In the first
place L wasn’t 100% sure which mall and we figured it out through process of elimination, but I’m not sure why he couldn’t just touch base with the
girl to make sure.
L texted the
girl from our car that we were running a
little late (in other words, he did have a way to contact her).
Anyway, we got to the mall and I
parked my car in a visible spot and told L and Hi that as long as they
saw the car there, I was hanging out in Barnes
and Nobel. I thought I'd just enjoy some time with books and in air conditioning, since it was a hot day.
Five minutes later (I
hadn’t even got past the case of cheapo books in the vestibule), L found me and told me he had a problem.
It turned out that they did NOT have a ride to practice. Instead, apparently all of them would need a ride from the mall to rehearsal....
My options were say no and take L and Hi back home with me or say yes, but extract a concession from L: no internet the next day so that he would move forward
with some of his projects.
I rushed home to get some things done in what was left of the day. H didn’t go with me to practice because we didn't know if there would be room in the car - but really I think he was super happy to stay home, partly because the world cup match wasn’t over when I left and partly because that drive to rehearsal (and the wait) is getting old. . ..
The good news is that last week H and I took a walk during rehearsal and we discovered that the public library is just really close to the rehearsals. I've been waiting in a supermarket that has some tables (and a starbucks) inside, but it's been so freezing and there's no shade outside to wait during the day.
OK.
OK.
Gotto go pick up L from college orientation (20 miles) and then take him to... rehearsal which isn't that far at all - about a half hour. It's just far enough that I say, if I drive there and back and there and back I'm using double the gas and also I've spent two plus hours of my day driving.
Seriously, the kid has been talking about getting his drivers permit but then doesn't do it. ..
30 June 2014
rrrring rrrring: missed the call but learns the lesson.
So, today L. was reluctantly working on a job
application.
L: “What’s the telephone number of that phone I carry
around?”
M: “Where is it?”
L: opening a drawer in the desk, “It’s not here.”
M: “Where is it?”
L: “I have it.” (gesturing vaguely toward his room)
M: “Let me just call
it. If you are going to use that number
in your job applications, let’s make sure that you have it on you and it’s
charged.”
phone: rrrring ring ring
L. follows the sound and finds the phone in a bag he had
used that was sitting in the basement. He comes upstairs, opens the phone and
makes a phone call.
L: “Hello. I got a call two days ago, and I’m sorry, my
phone was off.”
He had gotten a call from somebody at a music
store in response to an on-line application he had put in. Because he hadn’t bothered to carry the phone or check it, he didn't know he was missing out on a job that would have been good for him. Sigh…
So, I resisted the urge to rub it in or lecture, except that
I said, “Thank you.” The kid should be
grateful; I’m doing everything I can to help him avoid spending the summer
working with me.
21 June 2014
Her Hair Movie
H. told me that he had gotten the movie "Hair" on Netflix, and I was intrigued. I had never seen it. It's not the type of movie my husband would ever watch, so I assumed that he got it either because he'd just read some sort of retrospective review or because he thought our son (L.) wanted to see it.
So, I invited L. to watch "Hair" also. We had this whole conversation about "Hair," (mainly in Spanish). So, it's really funny that when H. put the movie on, it was "Her", that new movie about a guy who falls in love with his operating system. (I had told H. I wanted to watch it).
Ha ha. I liked "Her" and L. actually said it was the best romantic comedy he'd seen. (So, thumbs up from us).
Since I now had Hair stuck in my head, and taking advantage of how distracted H. has been by the world cup, I snuck "Hair" (1979) onto our netflix queue and, over the past couple of days, I watched it. H usually controls the queue as though it were a matter of life and death.
PS mixed feelings about "Hair": it's over two hours and has way too much unnecessary filler material (random songs). But... I have to say that I don't regret watching it, even if I did watch part of it on 1.4 speed --I lost patience with it for awhile.
So, I invited L. to watch "Hair" also. We had this whole conversation about "Hair," (mainly in Spanish). So, it's really funny that when H. put the movie on, it was "Her", that new movie about a guy who falls in love with his operating system. (I had told H. I wanted to watch it).
Ha ha. I liked "Her" and L. actually said it was the best romantic comedy he'd seen. (So, thumbs up from us).
Since I now had Hair stuck in my head, and taking advantage of how distracted H. has been by the world cup, I snuck "Hair" (1979) onto our netflix queue and, over the past couple of days, I watched it. H usually controls the queue as though it were a matter of life and death.
PS mixed feelings about "Hair": it's over two hours and has way too much unnecessary filler material (random songs). But... I have to say that I don't regret watching it, even if I did watch part of it on 1.4 speed --I lost patience with it for awhile.
02 July 2013
paper trail or lost and found
I was doing my taxes (asked for an extension this year) and that led me to search through folders looking for some lost receipts.
There's too much paper in my life. I want to throw out some of these things. Then again, when I look at the scraps, I see things that I've forgotten:
I visited my mom from June 15 - 19 2005... I traveled alone. Ouch. I'm just noticing that I had to be at the airport at 6:00 am and I flew from LaGuardia . That ticket was cheap ( $258.00) but it was also the flight that caused H forevermore to reject with a passion ANY travel plans that involve LaGuardia. Lo siento; it was an accident, I didn't mean to leave from LaGuardia. (rip - throw out one piece of paper).
In 2005 I also got a Washington DC hotel on priceline for one weekend in April so that H could take his Board Exams. Did L and I travel with him? I'm not sure. I'll have to look to see if he drove or took the train... if he drove, we went too (rip).
Then, a few weeks later H traveled to Atlanta, Georgia for work. I have a "statement" for his extra expenses at the Ritz-Carlton. $6.00 on the "Honor Bar"... Ha ha. I bet that was a tiny bag of peanuts from the refrigerator in his room. It really isn't like H to do that. I'm not surprised by the $14.00 from "Ocean Café Liquor" because that probably covered one drink at the hotel bar. (rip).
Oh, look, here are the boarding passes for that trip to Denver in June 2005. How quaint. I haven't had an authentic boarding pass in a long time. (rip ... ooooh real magnetic strips & they don't tear)
What have we here? A receipt for another trip to Denver in 2004 (2/26 - 3/01). I traveled alone again and I checked a bag. Nowadays I wouldn't check the bag for a short trip because I'd be charged. I only paid $236 to United and that was an easy direct flight compared to the one I would take the next year.
Oh, this is sad. In October 2004 we traveled to Tampa Florida for the funeral of H's sister-in-law. She had a brain tumor and I think she had been sick and slowly getting worse for about 2 years. H's brother was left with their teenage son. Her death seemed like the tragedy then, but later we realized that it was just... just a tiny sprout of what would become the real tragedy of our lives.
See? this is why it's hard to sort through old papers
Oh, wow. I just looked at that last paper again and I realized that H traveled alone. Isn't that sad? When I wrote those paragraphs, I thought I had been with him and, for a second, I even vaguely recalled a photo of that trip. But, no.
Somewhere in that folder is the receipt for the next trip we took to Florida. It was a wedding. H's brother remarried. Those are the photos I remembered seeing, and I think that I only connected them with the funeral because they have nothing happy about them except our expressions.
Sigh. I'm stopping now. I'm not going to look for any more documents.
There's too much paper in my life. I want to throw out some of these things. Then again, when I look at the scraps, I see things that I've forgotten:
I visited my mom from June 15 - 19 2005... I traveled alone. Ouch. I'm just noticing that I had to be at the airport at 6:00 am and I flew from LaGuardia . That ticket was cheap ( $258.00) but it was also the flight that caused H forevermore to reject with a passion ANY travel plans that involve LaGuardia. Lo siento; it was an accident, I didn't mean to leave from LaGuardia. (rip - throw out one piece of paper).
In 2005 I also got a Washington DC hotel on priceline for one weekend in April so that H could take his Board Exams. Did L and I travel with him? I'm not sure. I'll have to look to see if he drove or took the train... if he drove, we went too (rip).
Then, a few weeks later H traveled to Atlanta, Georgia for work. I have a "statement" for his extra expenses at the Ritz-Carlton. $6.00 on the "Honor Bar"... Ha ha. I bet that was a tiny bag of peanuts from the refrigerator in his room. It really isn't like H to do that. I'm not surprised by the $14.00 from "Ocean Café Liquor" because that probably covered one drink at the hotel bar. (rip).
Oh, look, here are the boarding passes for that trip to Denver in June 2005. How quaint. I haven't had an authentic boarding pass in a long time. (rip ... ooooh real magnetic strips & they don't tear)
What have we here? A receipt for another trip to Denver in 2004 (2/26 - 3/01). I traveled alone again and I checked a bag. Nowadays I wouldn't check the bag for a short trip because I'd be charged. I only paid $236 to United and that was an easy direct flight compared to the one I would take the next year.
Oh, this is sad. In October 2004 we traveled to Tampa Florida for the funeral of H's sister-in-law. She had a brain tumor and I think she had been sick and slowly getting worse for about 2 years. H's brother was left with their teenage son. Her death seemed like the tragedy then, but later we realized that it was just... just a tiny sprout of what would become the real tragedy of our lives.
See? this is why it's hard to sort through old papers
Oh, wow. I just looked at that last paper again and I realized that H traveled alone. Isn't that sad? When I wrote those paragraphs, I thought I had been with him and, for a second, I even vaguely recalled a photo of that trip. But, no.
Somewhere in that folder is the receipt for the next trip we took to Florida. It was a wedding. H's brother remarried. Those are the photos I remembered seeing, and I think that I only connected them with the funeral because they have nothing happy about them except our expressions.
Sigh. I'm stopping now. I'm not going to look for any more documents.
29 June 2013
scam or virus alert?
So, I got this weird e-mail...
It has been drawn to our attention that one of your computers is at risk from a virus attack. Please
remove all your personal data from all of your home computers and mobile devices.
Also visit this url to rectify security problems
https://bitly.com/
-The Gmail Team
And it was "via" my OWN e-mail address.
It has been drawn to our attention that one of your computers is at risk from a virus attack. Please
remove all your personal data from all of your home computers and mobile devices.
Also visit this url to rectify security problems
https://bitly.com/
-The Gmail Team
And it was "via" my OWN e-mail address.
I didn't even open it because I could read the first few words that g-mail shows you before you open it. Instead I had H come upstairs to see this weird message... H decided to alert g-mail that this virus alert (from myself) was spam... Except that he accidentally alerted g-mail that a different message in my in-box was spam. I could tell that he had done it wrong, but he wouldn't let me sit at my own computer to see. I was asking him, "Did you check the box by that virus alert?" And he was saying that he had, but I was pretty sure that he hadn't. Ha ha - You can just imagine the scene as us old-folks freak out about this new type of scam.
Then L comes up the stairs saying, "You got a spam message from yourself?? The only time I've seen that happen is when somebody leaves their e-mail open on sombebody else's computer!"
Ha ha. I'm not that slow. I got the joke right away. Well done... We went for it - hook, line and sinker. (Always log out of your e-mail). But, seriously, L does not know how many times I have resisted the temptation on his e-mail. Oh, I did once use his facebook to view all of his brother's posts and I left a message which made reference to my "secret identity" which L did not find at all funny. I had to swear never to do that again.**
And once I did add a very loving description of myself to a paper that L asked me to proofread for him. I found it so hilarious that, as usual, I couldn't stop laughing. It makes it hard to really do any practical jokes.
** On my honor as a mother, I have always resisted the temptation to peruse L's facebook when he leaves it open. The most I have ever done is see the most recent messages (the ones he has left on the screen when he leaves the house with the page still open).
And once I did add a very loving description of myself to a paper that L asked me to proofread for him. I found it so hilarious that, as usual, I couldn't stop laughing. It makes it hard to really do any practical jokes.
** On my honor as a mother, I have always resisted the temptation to peruse L's facebook when he leaves it open. The most I have ever done is see the most recent messages (the ones he has left on the screen when he leaves the house with the page still open).
25 June 2013
In which L walks to the doctor's office full speed ahead
So today L had a doctor's appointment to get his HPV vaccine at 10 am. The doctor's office is only about 10 blocks from our house and when we were ready to leave, I said we were walking.
L: Why?
M: Because I need the exercise.
L: But I already worked out today! C'mon!... I'm tired. Why do we have to walk. (keeps insisting)
The above conversation clearly isn't our exact words; I'm trying to convey that L is a bit on the confrontational side. Plus he has some trouble with please and thank you. This is something I've been trying to explain to L: the "catch more flies with honey" concept. V is especially sensitive to L's tone and she responds to it with a complete unwillingness to make concessions, and that is not who she usually is... That's not a complaint about V; in fact I'm grateful to her for keeping me aware. It's hard to explain how easy it is to just stop noticing the tone except when it goes waaaay overboard, and I'd miss a chance to work on a life-lesson.
Back to today: I refused to drive. and I told him that I wouldn't change my mind.
L: "You're showing me that you'll stick to your guns when faced with a reasonable request."
M: "I'm showing you that I won't reward rude behavior."
So, L walks out the door full speed ahead calling over his shoulder, "Okay, let's go to the doctor's."
I was out the door 30 seconds later or so, but L was walking fast. I managed to catch up to him at one stop light but then he pulled ahead again and I was 1/2 a block behind him the whole way. I was getting that terrible stress-response laughter that I get and trying not to giggle so that I could conserve my oxygen... but, of course, there was something funny about it.
Anyway, in the doctor's office they asked us to stay for 15 minutes after the shot to make sure L wasn't going to have any reaction/dizziness especially since it turned out that he hadn't eaten any breakfast (Oops... maybe I should have driven, I was thinking). Plus it was hot hot hot. But when we left there, we were fine. All was forgiven for everyone.
I made him a lovely breakfast... cheese omelet, sliced potatoes heated in a bit of olive oil with salt and pepper and fresh garlic, whole wheat sour dough bread from the farmer's market, toasted with butter. When I asked him if the food had been good, he was picking up the last crumbs... and he said, "Okay."
I will continue to try to get the message to L: trite but true - a little manners go a long way. He is a good kid but he has been blessed with the adolescent sense of (I'm stopping because it is just too complex to describe here). You'll have to take my word for it that he can also be a doll.
And I really do need to do more exercise. puff
L: Why?
M: Because I need the exercise.
L: But I already worked out today! C'mon!... I'm tired. Why do we have to walk. (keeps insisting)
The above conversation clearly isn't our exact words; I'm trying to convey that L is a bit on the confrontational side. Plus he has some trouble with please and thank you. This is something I've been trying to explain to L: the "catch more flies with honey" concept. V is especially sensitive to L's tone and she responds to it with a complete unwillingness to make concessions, and that is not who she usually is... That's not a complaint about V; in fact I'm grateful to her for keeping me aware. It's hard to explain how easy it is to just stop noticing the tone except when it goes waaaay overboard, and I'd miss a chance to work on a life-lesson.
Back to today: I refused to drive. and I told him that I wouldn't change my mind.
L: "You're showing me that you'll stick to your guns when faced with a reasonable request."
M: "I'm showing you that I won't reward rude behavior."
So, L walks out the door full speed ahead calling over his shoulder, "Okay, let's go to the doctor's."
I was out the door 30 seconds later or so, but L was walking fast. I managed to catch up to him at one stop light but then he pulled ahead again and I was 1/2 a block behind him the whole way. I was getting that terrible stress-response laughter that I get and trying not to giggle so that I could conserve my oxygen... but, of course, there was something funny about it.
Anyway, in the doctor's office they asked us to stay for 15 minutes after the shot to make sure L wasn't going to have any reaction/dizziness especially since it turned out that he hadn't eaten any breakfast (Oops... maybe I should have driven, I was thinking). Plus it was hot hot hot. But when we left there, we were fine. All was forgiven for everyone.
I made him a lovely breakfast... cheese omelet, sliced potatoes heated in a bit of olive oil with salt and pepper and fresh garlic, whole wheat sour dough bread from the farmer's market, toasted with butter. When I asked him if the food had been good, he was picking up the last crumbs... and he said, "Okay."
I will continue to try to get the message to L: trite but true - a little manners go a long way. He is a good kid but he has been blessed with the adolescent sense of (I'm stopping because it is just too complex to describe here). You'll have to take my word for it that he can also be a doll.
And I really do need to do more exercise. puff
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)